10) He makes us forget Evgeni Malkin plays in the Eastern Conference
9) We never pulled all-nighters with Mario Lemieux listening to Roch Voisine and making fun of Jaromir Jagr
8) We will never get as much ass living in a basement for six years
7) He makes Flyers fans hate that they have Claude Giroux
6) We couldn`t have cared less if Erik Cole had 5 points (I’m talking to you RDS)
5) We could never give Tim a Peter North-sized boner like the one he has now
4) The Eagles would ask him to be their QB (yahtzee!)
3) He makes Pascal Dupuis become Pavel Datsyuk
2) Even if we were homosexual, it wouldn`t be a big deal
1) We could never come back after being inactive for over a year and skullfuck the ice we are skating on.
Thanks Sid
P.S. Imagine I sent this to him?!
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