THE DRAFT

Gentlemen, it is upon us.  Although this website has taken a hiatus these past few months, there will be no more excuses; this blog is here to stay and will be relevant just like this pool. Not everyone will agree with my views and opinions but I admire a man like Michael Landsberg and you do too. This pool, thanks to Devin McKinley, has been taking over our lives and making our relationships harder than they actually are. The truth is we couldn’t be happier about that.

This upcoming draft is so special that the anticipation is higher than Scarlett Johansson’s leaked nude photos. Let’s take a look at these jugulars for a moment:

THINGS TO WATCH OUT FOR IN THE 2011-2012 DRAFT

-Who spills beer/food/other shit on Tim’s floor/carpet/valuable piece of furniture

I could have a little side-pot going on, but I’m going to go out on a limb here and say everything should be fine. No surprises, no messes. But BestPool draft day is like having 700$ cash in a strip club; you know you might be missing a piece of your soul at the end of the night and by gosh you don’t give a fuck because it feels extravagant. Let us all respect his place like it is ours and show our appreciation with the utmost respect…but I tell you, those Withers brothers always have something up their sleeve.

-The evolution of Ricky Vallis

The ongoing joke in this league is that the bottom spot is reserved for Ricky Vallis but I don’t buy it anymore. Not only is Ricky’s hockey knowledge growing, but so is his place in the pool. Vallis doesn’t fuck around anymore; he isn’t in this for 60, 70 or 80 bucks. He wants to win. Even if we think half of his roster won’t get him anywhere, he knows who to protect and he knows who will fit best into his line-up. I predict Ricky to do well this year. Will he finish Top 3? Ok, let’s be a little reasonable here. Although the further he stays away from Chuck Kobasew, the better his chances will be.

-The revenge of Matt Withers

Matt takes a lot of shit in this pool. It could be because of the way he walks and talks but you’ve got to feel for the elder Withers brother. I mean, being top spot for nine months and losing it all in the last few weeks is worse than walking in on your girlfriend being pounded doggy-style by your Dad. Seriously, think about that…envision her ass thrusting the piece that got you here every time you think about your girlfriend…yeah, that’s how Matt felt. Who knows how Matt will draft and who knows how his roster will look. The thing is he knows his team fucked up last year but he will still walk around with that swagger he has prior to the draft. The biggest mountain Matt must climb is Mount Confidence, because he cannot let that shit drop. If he walks in thinking he is better than all of us and chirps the shit out of us after three beers, he’s back in it. Plus, you got to give it to him: putting your kid in a Maple Leafs jersey and the little guy is still the cutest thing Ontario has to offer…man, that’s really impressive.  

-The debut of Scott ‘‘Pipeszannegger’’ Braganza

The almighty Ringer himself has joined last minute and he’s already had a successful off-season. Even though you look at Ringer’s team and you might not have gone for those players you have to admit he’s doing it right. He’s building quite a decent squad from scratch and will make his mark quickly. To say he will break into the Top 5 à la ‘‘Sophomore Simpson’’ might be pushing it although from what we are seeing, he isn’t to be taken lightly.

-The McKinleys

There’s one thing about the McKinleys that everyone can agree on: they always make their presence felt as contenders. Whether its Rylan’s sneaky game plans (like taking a nap mid-draft to come out with a better team than all of us) or Devin’s long-term plan (to draft the stars of Pierrefonds Minor Hockey so that in a few years he is humbling all of us), it simply works for them. Not only does it work, but it haunts our dreams like that bitch in Snow White. Their impressive knowledge of the game and their relentless effort to better their rosters is something we all must watch out for. If only Joey’s potluck idea could work, because God Almighty I would have dumped have a pack of laxatives all over their chicken wing sauce (yet through the midst of painful diarrhea, they would have still drafted better players than all of us).

-Joey Vivani’s approach

It’s going to be interesting to see what Sexy Jojo decides to do this year. In all honesty, his roster is decimated but there’s one thing Joey does well and that’s getting the best out of his players. He is not shy to go for some grinders we would never touch and when he has his eyes set on a certain man, it works out perfectly for him. When he goes for it, he goes for it. That monumental Carter-Krejci deal last year really was the last cumshot in our mouths that we would be tasting for years.  Could Joey do it twice in a row? It is highly unlikely, but it isn’t impossible either.

-The Red Guys

Before I go any further with this one, it is obvious the top red defensemen are coming from Rylan’s team. Don’t worry my friend Rylan, you should take it as a compliment. Rylan getting a cheap, stellar defence is nothing short of immaculate considering the names and value of those players. There are a handful of forwards as well, even some franchise players who will be thrown back into the pot. The worst part is the price you will be paying for most of them. Don’t think for one minute a guy like Drew Doughty will go for the same price. Everyone is eager to get their hands on a free agent, and the bottom line is every single one of us is going to get a top player to better our squad. Just be prepared to pay a hefty price for some of them because of competition and roster greed.   

Alex Giardini

BestPool Correspondent